Sunday, October 21, 2012

wish there was more

I really do, but I don't seem to have it in me right now.  All I seems to do is read....reading is good it's an escape, but sometimes I fear too much of an escape and it takes over everything.  It just becomes all consuming and I slip into the fantasy world of fiction.  Sad though really because it makes me irritable when disturbed and I can't focus on much else.  I know it's a coping method I am using because I am feeling very down right now....unfortunately it's not helping with it at all and I actually think it's making it worse!  I tend to get thoroughly wrapped up in a book, in the characters, in the whole feelings involved in the book.  I fall in love with a character and then look around in my real life and come to the realization that no man will ever be good enough.  My life could be a bit a fiction itself anyway...last week I had 3 men tell me they love me......hahaha 3, I'm not kidding either.  Yet I sadly have no hand to hold.  I am alone.  Blah.....I best get to doing something else before I slip into a deep funk on this Sunday when I have other things to be doing.  Maybe I'll take some pictures and post a bit more later.
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